THOUGHTS FROM A MUSICIAN'S HEART
INEXORABLY DRAWN TO THIS BEAUTY
by Josh Graham
It is such a strange calling for God to bring us into music as our vocation and profession. While my childhood home was wonderful and was the place I met Jesus, I did not grow up in a household where classical music was common or sought out. While my parents, especially my dad, were big music lovers, it was much more in the classic rock stream, and Foreigner or Styx were the norm instead of Beethoven or Debussy.
When I was 8, my dad bought a drum set so he could learn for the church we had just started attending, and it followed that I would take lessons. I was never a very serious drummer, and played alto saxophone, not classical percussion, in school band from 6th through 10th grades.
However, when I switched to classical percussion my junior year of high school, I started listening to marimba recordings on iTunes, and fell in love with the instrument and eventually all classical music (but especially new music). Even though I came to it late, I have made a life and career in music, in a way that surprises me every time I consider it.
God's calling is not always something we can put our finger on. It may start as a feeling, it may seem like the thing we cannot stop doing, it could be because we don't know how we would do anything else. Music, as every music student heard from one relative or another as they were in school, is a hard path to make a life in. We all know this, but somehow we are inexorably drawn to this beauty, this desire to co-create, re-create, to be a part of bringing a bit of "Heaven to Earth," as N.T. Wright says.
Through life as a music student, a freelancer, and eventually a husband, father, and young professor, I have known factually that there are other things I could do that would be easier financially or provide me with more free time. Yet I know that I'm called to this, not by some internal desire, which is fleeting, but that God has put a path for me to serve and create beauty in this world through music.
I am fortunate to be in my third year of directing the percussion program at the University of Illinois Urbana-Champaign. I pray often for my students, for wisdom for how to winsomely share my faith in a rather secular setting, and for the ability to create an environment where all can thrive and that gives them some sort of nudge that this studio and space are "different" than the world.
I was recently reading a short biography of Fred Rogers, and I was struck how much Mr. Rogers Neighborhood was simply Fred's ministry. While Fred felt called to television, many of us are similarly called to music, and the chance to show God's face and glory through this medium. As any faculty member knows, part of the job description for a music professor is "Research/Creative Activity," and I tackle my role as a "researcher" with relish. I feel so blessed to consider what is missing from our repertoire, which composer needs to write the next great piece for percussion ensemble or solo marimba, and how we can add meaningfully to the beauty of God's Creation.
All this to say, a calling to music can feel confusing, especially when you're young, but I think God has reasons he puts these desires in our hearts. We have a field to tend, and a way to reflect God's goodness through what we do. I pray often to remember this reality.
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